Baggage Claim... Again?

"Baggage Claim… Again?"

(Casual Blogging Series #6 – Sunday, December 13, 2009) – Birthday Reflection

By Deshi Ramadhani, SJ

I know this is not new. I must have mentioned it several times. Recently I’ve been traveling across the globe: in October westwards to Rome, Italy, and last week eastwards to the down under, Melbourne and Sydney, Australia. I’ve earned a nickname, for better or for worse, a “flying priest.” During those trips, as had happened several times before, the baggage claim experiences turned out to be significant.

Waiting for my bag on the baggage belt can become like life-or-death experience. If after some time I don’t see my bag, I begin to worry: Is it coming? Has someone stolen it? Has it been taken by mistake? Once I see it, I feel such a big thrill. But this time something new dawned on me. Assuming that there is no malice, why on earth do people take a wrong bag that doesn’t really belong to them? I can only find one answer: because the bag itself appears to be theirs! No surprise! Many bags just look the same! [And worse, if you go to Indonesia, they don’t really check your baggage claim tags before you walk out from the airport! Oh well…]

This made me think. If I were like a bag moving on the baggage belt, who will pick me and claim me? What would be on my bag tag? Is it clearly written “Christ’s,” or what? This is what I have done so many times: I put other names on it. Here are some examples: “Career’s” – “Pleasure’s” – “Comfort’s” – “Lust’s” – “Fame’s” – “Pride’s” – “Intimacy’s” – “Success’s” and on and on and on… you name it. Whenever I put those names on top of the real label “Christ’s,” then of course, I make my life such a mess. Not only that, I hurt others as well, because I turn their sincere trust into just a cheap toy!

Yesterday, December 12, I turned 43. I thank God for so many wonderful people who have always been there to peel off other labels I have glued on my life bag tag, and make the real one visible, “Christ’s”! And when they see me being taken away, they are willing to fight for me… “God, You know me, nothing hidden to You…”

Mall Janitor

“Mall Janitor”
Lent 2009 – Day 34 (Apr 04)

By Deshi Ramadhani, SJ

Back to the mall! Let’s go to the restrooms. Sure enough, we will find the janitors. You can tell the quality of the mall by looking at how the janitors are. I’m impressed by the janitors who keep cleaning the restroom. For my standard, sometimes it is even a lot cleaner than my own bedroom! Yet, he keeps wiping, drying, cleaning. It must be written in his job descriptions. Their job is to look at the smallest dirt, or water drops, or stains, and clean it right away. In order to do this, they have to be trained and therefore they have a greater awareness of the uncleanness.

Why clean if it is not dirty? Why fix if it is not broken? Why renew our life if it is still good? This is what I often ask. Conversion will never happen, unless God gives me a new awareness of the uncleanness in me. As long as I think that it is not dirty, I will never clean it. I have other plans to do, and I go for it.

Sometimes I compare myself with some fellow priests. They look calm, orderly, human, happy, responsible, and honest. At times simply encountering some fellow priests can be a gentle reminder from God. It is as if I have to realize that my own bedroom is a lot dirtier than the restrooms at the mall!

It’s true, as it has often been said, that to err is human, but to forgive is divine. The most difficult person to forgive is my own self. Why? I don’t always want to recognize the uncleanness within me. The good news, God is willing to be that responsible janitor and right now is waiting in front of my bedroom door. If Lent is like training time to develop a new awareness, will I now let Him in?

Keeping the Promise

“Keeping the Promise”
Lent 2009 – Day 32 (Apr 02)

Deshi Ramadhani, SJ

Priests are human too. Strangely, for some, it’s hard to accept. If you know me well and live in the same house, you will immediately know what I mean. Yes, we priests, make mistakes, ranging from simply oversleeping and thus coming late to say Mass, to agreeing to preside a wedding for two different couples in two different churches at the same time! Yet, people keep coming to us priests and ask for our prayers.

A senior priest jokingly said to a group of lay audience, “When your priest says, ‘I’ll pray for you,’ don’t believe him. He won’t do it. There are too many people asking him for prayers, and he can hardly remember each of them.” I can relate to this. Sometimes I can only say in my prayer, “God, I don’t remember who exactly has asked for my prayers and what petitions they have. But I want to keep my promise, and so I offer all of them to You.”

Breaking a promise is a lot easier than making it! This is certainly true with us humans, but not with God. The beauty is this: God knows that we will break our promise to Him, and that’s why God always keeps His promise to us! Yes, I said, “that’s why.” Our inability to keep our promise is the reason for God to keep His promise. After all, in terms of keeping promise before God, we are helpless! What a wonderful God we have.