Unimaginable Change

“Unimaginable Change”
Lent 2009 – Day 4 (Feb 28)

By Deshi Ramadhani, SJ

I love Harry Potter. Surprise, surprise! There have been times in my life when I really wished I had been given that magic wand. No, don’t get me wrong. I didn’t think of doing anything nasty against others. If I have that magic wand now, I will learn two basic commands: to clean up my room and to wash my car. After a long day of working, it would be heaven if with a right spell and movements with the wand, all the clutters on my desk will immediately put in order. In addition to this, it would be heaven to have my car always clean and shiny. (Oh by the way, on a side note, I consider my car as a “she,” and I named her “Naomi.” It is black and beautiful. Yes, you’re right it’s like a car version of Naomi Campbell. Please don’t tell my Superior or the Bishop about this). Especially in this rainy season, that magic wand is really in high demand. When I desperately try to find something hidden in the clutters on my desk, or when in the morning I walk to Naomi who sadly has become like the one who has just finished the Paris-Dakkar rally, I am brought back to earth. No, the truth is, I don’t have that magic wand. The truth is, I have to do something with the clutters on my desk. The reality is, I myself have to touch the mess!

Again, Lent is a joyful season. It’s joyful precisely because we are made aware (the more the better) of the messiness in our lives, and yet at the same time aware of the crystal clear promise from God. The prophet Isaiah invites us to look far ahead. If we engage ourselves to do good to others, “our light will rise in the darkness, and our shadows become like noon.” Amazing, isn’t it? Think about this. What you think as the darkest side of your life right now will turn to be the brightest. Your sins, with which you might have been wrestling (and may be you begin to loose hope for any signs of improvements), will be transformed to be blessings! What you have been trying to hide so far will be brought to light and thus be made light! I don’t know about you, but for me, this is indeed a great hope. Lent is a joyful time of the year. It is time for the unimaginable changes in our lives. The only condition is simple: let Jesus do it for you! Just lay back, relax, and watch Him working in your life, your family, those who have hurt you, and those whom you have hurt. Let Jesus’ hands touch the messiness in all that. Be aware of that Someone whose power is way beyond yours, even without that first class hand-made magic wand!

This is just how Jesus works. I would even say, this is His most favorite job. There is nothing else that would excite Him, than making great and unimaginable changes in people’s lives. If you still doubt, look at Levi, a notorious tax-collector. That man, probably with a very negative self-image from the stigma given him by society, didn’t have a slight idea when he got up from his sleep earlier that day. All he knew was that a young man with beard came to him and said: “Follow me!” At the end of that day, he realized that he had been transformed. Amazing, isn’t it? I know, I keep saying “amazing” not to persuade you into this seemingly journey of transformation. I’m doing it for myself, since I have to admit, I do need God’s grace to be amazed by the possibility of the unimaginable changes for me. The ruins in my life, the messy, dark, greasy parts in my life history, the choking dust under the rug of my hypocrisy, and all that, “will rise in the darkness, and become like noon.” Yes, it is the unimaginable change I want to believe during Lent. If you are not convinced yet, at least, pray for me for that courage to believe. I know I am sick and badly need a doctor. I know that Jesus is approaching with smile and eagerness to whisper softly in the depth of my heart: “Follow me!” I know these words will not only heal me, but also those I have hurt along the way.