Attractive Dependency

“Attractive Dependency”
Lent 2009 – Day 14 (Mar 12)

By Deshi Ramadhani, SJ

Believe it or not, a good number of people have asked me: “So, tell me honestly Father, what kind of woman do you find attractive?” I usually ask back: “And you are asking this to a celibate Roman Catholic priest?” However, for the sake of honesty, I then continue without hesitation: “A very independent woman.” Yes, I always admire an independent woman who shows an inner power that makes the world around her turn properly.

Ask a similar question to God: “God, what kind of person do You find attractive?” God will certainly say: “Any kind.” Then try to ask further: “Don’t You find an independent person more attractive?” At this, God will smile and say: “Not really. In fact, I often find a too independent person is more difficult to deal with.”

For us modern people, being dependent is not a quality we want to strive for. Yet before God, we do need to develop “a right sense of dependency.” A tree planted near a river will be fruitful since it has the right amount of water it is dependent to; not too little, not too much, just right! The poor man Lazarus is so dependent to others, and this helps him to be dependent to God. On the contrary, the rich man is severely punished not because he is rich, but because his being rich makes him lose any sense of dependency to God.

An independent person who has a right sense of dependency to God will in fact be a much more attractive person. Your sacred, healthy, and balanced dependency to God is a quality this world is badly longing to find.