God as Band-Aid

“God as Band-Aid”
Lent 2009 – Day 9 (Mar 6)

By Deshi Ramadhani, SJ

Who wants my conversion? Humanly speaking, I don’t. The only one who really wants my conversion is God. I’m just too comfortable with the way I have been hiding my sins. I’m fine with this and I’ve been smart enough in doing all this hiding. Sinning is serious, but hiding my sins is even more serious. Like Adam and Eve in the Garden. If the first sin is eating the fruit of knowledge about good and evil as a sin of doubting the gift from God, the second and more serious sin is hiding before God. After sin, Adam and Eve really learned how not to treat God as God the all-knowing.

Do you know “Band-Aid”? We use it when we accidentally cut ourselves. We use it to cover the cut, and wait till the cut is healed. After that, I simply peel the “Band-Aid” off and discard it. The dried blood stain on it will also be thrown away. That’s how I treat God at times, no more than just a “Band-Aid.” I use God when I need, and discard God when I’m healed. The sign of my wound symbolized by the dried blood stain will go away when I discard God on a trash, and never want to see it again. No one wants to put a used “Band-Aid” in a nice frame and hang it in his or her living room!

Convincing myself for a long time that everything is fine will drain up all my inner resources. In the process, God becomes a mere object. The good news is: for God, no matter what, I’m God’s precious child. God will just wait. How much longer do I want to make God wait?